home decor as self-care | five steps to reimagine interior design as an act of self-love
if there has ever been a time that has shown me that caring for my home is in fact an intentional form of self-care, it has been this past year. living through the ebb and flow of a global pandemic has challenged us in ways that have been equally humbling, devastating, and uplifting. one of the most beneficial acts of self-love I have engaged in; even before I knew how to label it as such, was taking note of, and listening carefully to, the small spaces in our home where we spend most days. the spaces that bring us surges of joy amongst notable disarray.
before i share with you what has worked for me, i wanted to insert a little disclaimer. perfection is not the goal of reimagining home decor as a form of self care. the goal is, in fact, the opposite.
recognizing the imperfections that make your house your home, and leaning into those.
seeing the mess, the dust, the lived-in spaces as an outpouring of love and an opening to your own style. and because of that, for me anyway, being able to sift through the anxieties that come with the notion of disorganization and chaos, and instead tease out the moments of light.
what follows is five steps i have found beneficial in rooting home decor musings as an ongoing practice of self-care. they can start and stop in whichever way feels organic to you. they are without rule in that sense and as such, can fluctuate as you grow, as you have space, and as you sense their need.
five steps to begin envisioning interior design as an act of self-love:
one | recognize space
two | notice colour
three | observe light
four | experience smell
five | define a sacred corner
one | recognize space
le sigh. this first one feels so heavy, or did feel so heavy to me at the beginning. where did i have space for anything in our little home? i was at the point where every deep breath i exhaled felt like it was running off into the last of the unused corners, that the rooms were closing in on me. toys. tools. dust. mess. an absolute lack of storage. how could i begin to recognize space in our little home when there was simply none?
this was essentially where my deep dive into home decor (as it serves me) began. what did decluttering mean to me? did i want to declutter, and if i did what did that say about me? throwing away things that make up and tell the story of our little family. the tiny treasures displayed haphazardly from my girls, tucked away in corners that they felt were magical, organized in a way that brought joy to their ever sparkling and curious stares. i sat in these feelings for a long time. and then i started to work through what we had, in a slow and methodical way (was what we had, what we truly needed?). what could be packed away and revisited, what must be displayed, what could be hidden without being neglected? where could i insert space for my exhale?
this took an intentional investment of thought and time. much more in comparison to the relatively small number of funds i had to allocate for baskets, shelving, and some meaningful storage pieces once i had engaged in the work of decluttering first in my mind.
two | notice colour
what’s in a colour? i won’t pretend to be an expert on anything i journal about in this space, so colour is no exception. but there are endless writings and observations about the psychology of colour and if my perspectives resonate with you, i would imagine that you might get lost in the magic of it all as well. for me, it was certainly worth a look, and then another, and then a deeper dive. colour might be my most favourite step of this process (today, anyway). i find it so fascinating that a certain colour, or hue, can impact our emotions in such different ways. different colours affecting one individual differently on different days. different colours impacting individuals differently altogether. colours being connected to emotions, to actions, to sensations. take time to notice what that means for you.
forget the trends and today’s most Instagram-able preferences.
or don’t.
choose what resonates with you - and go there.
commit to colours and colour combinations that make you feel a certain way. this one step alone is freeing, almost. at this point in my life i gravitate towards earthy neutrals such as white, beige, taupe, and brown; with the occasional green for good measure. for now, those are the colours that ground me most, and so for now i will rest there and revisit when or if i need.
three | observe light
okay, each of these steps i sink into happen to be my favourite at the given time. but maybe that is part of the beauty of reimaging home decor as a form of self love and self care. light is a big one for me, as even in small batches it invites warmth and routine into my home. light is well known to impact our moods and paying careful attention to light in our space has allowed me to notice spaces and moments that i might have first walked through without a second glance. light asks me to pause and appreciate, which, in essence, is why light is a fundamental step to how i incorporate decor into our home.
the steps I took to harness and take advantage of the light in our home are simple. i took the time to appreciate where the light entered, how long it stayed, and how it changed through the seasons. i removed the old, tired blinds, that were heavy in both appearance and the feeling of weight in the rooms. i replaced them with soft linens in some spaces, and in others, with nothing at all. then, i moved our furniture, my beloved house plants, and all the girls foraged treasures to sit in my favourite pockets of light.
four | incorporate texture and smell
if you found your way here from my Instagram space, these steps should come as no surprise. i truly feel they go hand in hand. again, exceptionally individual – texture and smell should make you feel something. when it comes to texture for me, its linens and oversized knits. in a way they connect me to the earth and have also cradled me through motherhood and this creative journey i have been embarking on. i found this out when i spent time creating my capsule wardrobe, realizing that these textures should transcend into other areas of my life as well. linen bedding. oversized knit throw blankets; an oasis of texture really. furthermore, i found that when i paired these two elements with wood and jute, my personal style suddenly felt grounded and solid. this made me feel fundamentally better, which translated into the whole notion of decor as a form of self care.
the second element of this step for me is smell. i think the combination of texture and smell in a space is influential, in a way i hadn’t fully appreciated before. something as simple as a breeze through a window, a spring rain, the smell of the ocean just before a storm rolls in. it’s noticeable to even the youngest of minds, which makes sense i suppose given that they are much more present in moments than i am capable of being. my oldest walked through the door at the ripe age of four last summer and declared, it smells like home, ma. and before i had the chance to inquire as to what that meant, she declared, “like lavender, garden tomatoes and sand from the beach”. there it was, so plainly. she was confirming my ordinary every day dreams out loud.
so, as i shift through the stages of motherhood:
pregnancy, breastfeeding, toddler chasing and raising, the use of smells in our home changes and so does my appreciation for them.
sometimes more delicate for the days that require, sometimes more intense and intentional. this is an area where i am still experiencing growth. for now, i gravitate towards lavender and rose, but also towards smells that are earthy and grounding. i have almost eliminated all fragrances from our home that come from unnatural sources and this has been a enormous change for a millennial that grew up with body sprays, cheap candles, and products that were routinely riddled with this sort of thing. in that sense, learning about scent and smell has been healing for me, but i recognize and hold space for the truth that I am only in the beginning phases of this journey.
five | define a sacred corner
for me, defining a sacred corner for myself was the finishing touch; however, this could arguably be the beginning space for some. i have almost always been an person who considers things from the ground up, which is why working through decluttering, choosing colour, noticing light and smell, were so fundamentally integral for me begin with in hopes of landing here. but perhaps you are someone who thrives in dreaming of the bigger picture first. if so, start here. there is no right or wrong way to go about this, after all.
my scared corner is our bedroom, which also happens to be a shared space – the nursery for our littlest love. landing here, noticing the impact that this space has on how i interact with my little world on a day to day basis; it truly was a coming home moment for me. this space, for many years of my adult life was one that i had essentially neglected. i now know that it was rooted in some limiting belief that caring for my own space, before the other spaces in my home that people see and live in, was somehow selfish. This space that welcomes me every morning and sees me to sleep each evening, it was my sacred corner; despite how neglected and empty it had evolved to be.
nonetheless, i began.
recognizing the space.
removing the unnecessary.
appreciating the movement and flow.
noticing the colour. choosing it with intention. spending time making choices that reflects our home and sentiment; drowning out the noise of perfectly curated spaces that surrounded me on social channels. sinking into my own style, despite it not following any known rules or patterns.
observing the light. where i found and felt energy from all the not so perfect corners and angles that cocooned me.
incorporating texture and smell. natural elements that ground me daily. linens. wood. jute. plants. oils.
and in those small, but thoughtful acts, i could start to define a sacred corner. for me. for my partner. for the newest little light in our lives. when everything else in the world seemed to be teetering on the edge of uncertainty. these small steps have helped me find how home décor can be an act of self-love and care.